7 Tips to Make Life Less Fearful For Your Children

FEAR- its a big topic these days. I'm seeing so manywithdrawal from others. Stay open and connected to
children, teens, and adults impacted by fear. Whetherothers even in time of great difficulty. This is a
it is fear from a weak economy, fear from not doingpowerful opportunity to allow others to support you
things good enough, fear of embarrassment, or fearand will deepen the relationship.
of spooky things in the closet, fear impacts4. Do not impose adult problems on your children:
everyone. Create open opportunities to explore whatYou child does not need to know the specifics about
things you or your children are afraid of. By gentlythe stress you may be encountering. It is not helpful
asking what kind of things are you scared of youfor you to share with your child your financial worries
may uncover some areas you can grow more. Theor job worries. You do not need to share specific
creative tips below will help you create emotionaldetails with your children. For instance if they ask for
safety as you explore your (and your child's) fears.something you cannot afford you can answer
Fear has rippled through the economy and impactedwith,"We are choosing not to buy that right now",
daily choices. How has it impacted the averagerather than, "We can't afford that, you know things
household and what are some creative ways toare really hard right now and we do not have extra
reduce stress for the whole family?money for you to get whatever you want".
As much as you would like to believe that adult5. Be open without being fearful:
worries do not impact your whole family, it's just notYou can model open communication with your family
true. Children are tuned into their parents moods andwithout giving a message of fear. If you are talking
actions. This occurs from the attachment bonds asabout the state of the economy or about someone
babies and continues throughout the parent childwho lost their house or job you can clarify how your
relationship. When there is uncertainty in thefamily is safe. For example, "That happened, but we
household it impacts the whole family and creates ahave a savings account, a good job, our home, and
sense of feeling psychologically unsafe. You can useeach other".
some of these tips to help create a feeling of safety6. Listen and normalize:
and consistency even during fearful times.Sometimes listening is enough, without trying to
1. Keep a schedule:problem solve. You can normalize feelings by letting
I can't stress this one enough. I know that life is filledyour child know that adults have feelings like worry,
with unexpected events that can change a schedulefear, sadness, anger too. Talk about how it is normal
at any moment: however creating a schedule andto have these feelings and different ways they can
doing your best to maintain it provides consistencyexpress these feelings, such as journal writing, talking
and safety.to a friend, petting the dog, going for a walk, etc.
2. Follow through with meaningful rituals:7. Do something:
When families face crisis there is a tendency toCognitive behavior therapy suggests that doing
isolate from others and most rituals and celebrationssomething different or thinking something different
are diminished. It is important to honor celebrations,will influence how you feel. If you want to reduce
even at times when things are difficult. Thethe worries and fear it's time to take action. Turn off
celebration does not need to be "fake" or pretendingthe bleak news and do something pleasurable. Have
things are fine if they are not. Instead find a way toan art night scheduled where everybody in the family
honor the person or situation in a respectful andmakes something together. This is a great way to
loving way.build relationships, have fun, while doing something
3. Stay connected:emotionally positive and teaching valuable
Fear, loss, and embarrassment often leads toself-soothing skills.