| Are you abusing alcohol? Married to someone who is? | | | | term, so it isn't surprising that many of us have |
| Is a family member emotionally and financially draining | | | | found ourselves self-medicating. The trouble is, it can |
| you? Have you found looking for real help even more | | | | also undermine us when it comes to developing |
| frustrating than coping with the problem? You're not | | | | healthy long term solutions to these same problems. |
| alone, but there are options beyond the old failed | | | | Still, the message is clear, curing alcohol problems, |
| approaches. | | | | yours or someone else's, means being willing to look |
| Successfully leaving alcohol problems behind means | | | | at what everyone's getting out the drinking and then |
| understanding that alcohol abuse and dependence are | | | | finding other solutions that work better. Unhappily, |
| coping behaviors gone wrong, not the incurable, | | | | traditional 12 Step and AA based solutions frequently |
| progressive diseases they are frequently - and falsely | | | | leave spouses and family members worse off, as our |
| - portrayed as. The second real step in altering | | | | article for wives makes clear. |
| alcohol abuse habits is realizing that people can. No, | | | | Looking at ending alcohol problems in their context |
| they're not powerless and there isn't a shred of | | | | hasn't been widely practiced, though some of us |
| evidence to support that idea either. | | | | have been doing it for over twenty years. Why not? |
| What does the research show? It shows that people | | | | Simply put, because it's hard work. Much easier to |
| who are motivated to change, who believe that they | | | | plug people into a "model" even though it doesn't fit; |
| can change, and who get good short-term support, | | | | parade them through a bunch of hocus pocus steps |
| succeed in leaving their alcohol abuse behind. The | | | | that usually make things worse; then blame them |
| same goes for spouses and families who are trying | | | | when they, predictably, continue drinking. It doesn't |
| to cope with another person's alcohol abuse - you | | | | hurt that most current treatment programs count on |
| can't force them to change, but you can stop | | | | recycling clients again, and again, and again. Most have |
| destroying yourselves and the rest of your family | | | | neither any real interest in fixing the problem, nor any |
| and, at the same time, increase the chances that the | | | | idea about how to do it even if they wanted to. |
| abuser will accept help. | | | | If you are really looking for effective help, look for |
| For everyone, the key comes from understanding | | | | resources that offer options, include family, refuse to |
| that alcohol abuse occurs within a context, not in | | | | subscribe to disease models, use research based |
| isolation. It isn't a disease a person gets over. It's a | | | | approaches, and stress the elimination of alcohol as a |
| way of dealing with anxiety, loneliness, depression, | | | | matter of concern. Don't settle for the mere |
| boredom, fear, or any number of other problems. | | | | substitution of one life deadening alcohol fixation for |
| There is no doubt that alcohol is an excellent drug for | | | | another. |
| effectively coping with these problems in the short | | | | |