| Codependence is a term that has been used | | | | attempt to cover for your partner and fulfill |
| extensively to describe some of the common | | | | commitments and responsibilities that your partner |
| character traits found in the partners of addicts. | | | | doesn't follow through with. This may come from a |
| These tendencies can also be found in partners who | | | | desire to protect your partner's reputation as well as |
| are involved in relationships with an unhealthy | | | | your own. You may also be ashamed of the fact |
| relationship dynamic, such as emotionally abusive | | | | that you are putting up with something you know |
| relationships. One of the key traits is overtolerance | | | | you shouldn't. |
| of destructive behavior patterns in a partner. This | | | | 3. You may feel a certain desperation about keeping |
| can lead to feeling of anger, martyrdom, and a desire | | | | the relationship together. You may feel as if you |
| to control the negative behavior of the addicted or | | | | cannot survive without this relationship and your |
| abusive partner, and a feeling of helplessness and | | | | partner, to the extent that you bury or avoid |
| excessive caretaking. Here are 4 signs that you may | | | | confrontation about his or her behavior. If you do get |
| have codependent tendencies in your relationship | | | | upset or issue ultimatums, you may end up going |
| with your partner: | | | | back on the follow through because it is more |
| 1. You may rationalize your partner's destructive | | | | important to keep the relationship in your life than to |
| behavior, or minimize it to yourself. You may tell | | | | risk losing it. |
| yourself that there are worse relationships or | | | | 4. Conversely, you may worry that your partner will |
| situations out there, but just because you aren't in | | | | not be able to go on in life without your help and |
| the worst case scenario you can imagine doesn't | | | | caretaking. You may take on guilt or responsibility for |
| mean that your relationship is healthy. It is like | | | | whatever self destructive actions your partner might |
| comparing car accidents - one may result in | | | | take if there were to be a break up. It feels more |
| permanent physical damage, the other may only | | | | comfortable for you to assume the role of caregiver |
| result in broken legs. But wouldn't it be better to | | | | and clean up the various crises than be involved in an |
| simply make it safely to your destination? | | | | equal, give and take relationship where both parties |
| 2. You may hide your partner's behavior, or make | | | | take responsibility for their actions. |
| excuses for it in front of others. You may even | | | | |