| Everyone needs and has a right to positive | | | | Unfortunately, the commercial aspect of society has |
| self-esteem. Genuine self-esteem is not based in | | | | (unwisely) taken advantage of low self-esteem by |
| appearance. Genuine self-esteem has nothing to do | | | | trying to sell the idea that if a person looks a certain |
| with color of hair, eyes or skin. It has nothing to do | | | | way their lives will be better. Rarely does this come |
| with the size of any body parts. Nor does it have | | | | true. This type of thinking has been part of the |
| anything to do with how we are put together | | | | problem for many years. Recently, I have noticed a |
| physically. | | | | change occurring, a maturation of thinking in |
| Genuine positive self-esteem comes from the inside | | | | commercial society. I see more and more people in |
| and begins when we are infants. It begins to grow | | | | advertisements and on TV shows whose appearance |
| from how well we are valued as infants, toddlers and | | | | is what might be called "average". I find this to be |
| children. As we grow up and begin to go out into the | | | | encouraging. |
| world we meet other people, many of whom have | | | | People with genuine positive self-esteem can resist |
| not been loved and valued well enough by their | | | | the pressure from others to "fix" their appearance. |
| parents or caretakers. Those people may try to | | | | Those with high self-esteem know that their |
| de-value us according to our appearance. This is | | | | appearance is good enough. People with high |
| immature, unhealthy thinking. That is when parents | | | | self-esteem base their self esteem on who they are, |
| caregivers can help children continue to build healthy | | | | rather than how they look. |
| internal self-esteem by teaching them how to ignore | | | | Changing our physical appearance does not change |
| that type of thinking. | | | | how we think or feel. Changing our physical |
| Attraction is based on appearance. However, | | | | appearance will not prevent the aging process. |
| attraction is short lived and has little to do with love. | | | | Enlarged breasts will fall, the body does get old, |
| Love takes work and involves respecting the other | | | | change is the only constant in life. And we have a |
| person. A person cannot love and respect another | | | | right and need to feel good about ourselves even |
| unless she/he loves and respects him/her self. Being | | | | when we are a hundred years old and laden with |
| able to love and respect yourself involves the building | | | | wrinkles. |
| of genuine self-esteem from infancy on up through | | | | Raising self-esteem involves mental and emotional |
| adulthood, from the inside out. People are much more | | | | work. Although I call this work, it is very pleasant to |
| attractive when they have genuine positive | | | | work to do, because feeling better about ourselves, |
| self-esteem. Inner directed positive self-esteem | | | | simply feels good. |
| results in individuals being more relaxed. | | | | |