Help! I Need a Counselor!

If you, like many people, have an underlying sense ofpowerful method of opening up to feelings, but it is
dissatisfaction with your life, have unsatisfyingnot for everyone as it can be quite intense.
relationships, have bouts of "the blues" or just feelHypnosis: Hypnotists avoid work with feelings or
trapped in your life, then you may want to find acognition. Their goal is to take away the symptom
therapist. A good therapist can help. If you arewith simple hypnotic suggestions. Some people are
suicidal, have any kind of addiction process going,more suggestive than others, and the method is
have panic or anxiety attacks, are harming yourselfmore effective for some people than others. There
or others (or just thinking about it), are seriouslyare a variety of hypnotic methods, but they all work
depressed, have wide mood swings, or hear voiceswith the idea that our mind is capable of
inside or outside of your head then you must find aunconsciously changing anything that we experience.
therapist.It can be used with addictions, pain, or any troubling
Locating a therapist that is a good fit for you can becondition. Generally speaking, it deals with the
a challenge. Therapists come in all shapes,symptom and does not address the underlying
personalities, ages and colors and have widely varyingcauses. It can be an amazing and surprisingly powerful
levels of skill and methodology. There are wholeway to reduce or eliminate symptoms. Hypnotism
books on finding a therapist. But the simplest methodcan be used to help uncover repressed traumatic
is finding the names of four or five therapists andmemories. Sometimes this can be re-traumatising, so
start interviewing them. You can find the names byif you choose to do this be aware that you could be
asking people you know who are in therapycausing more harm.
(preferably ones in whom you have observedInner Child/Family: This approach is where a therapist
positive changes), looking in the phone book, askingrecognizes that inside each of us is an internal
your insurance company, or on the Internet. Manyrepresentation of ourselves as a child, and perhaps,
therapists do not charge for the initial meeting, buteach of our family members. In working with the
you need to clarify that with them up front. If theyinternal family or child the therapist can readily unravel
do not, it doesn't mean they are not someone youthe events and cognitions that created the problems
would want to see, it may mean that they arethe person is having today. Therapists who work
heavily booked and can't afford to book an unpaidwith this approach are generally open to processing
session.of feelings and working to change cognitions that are
If you are familiar with the different types ofproblematic.
therapy you may want to find out what modes ofFamily Systems: Systems therapists approach
therapy they use. Here is a brief synopsis of theindividual problems as an issue of family dynamics.
different therapy methods:Often they will work with as many family members
Brief Therapy: These therapists will want to haveas they can enlist in therapy. It can impact your life in
you out of therapy in a short amount of time. Theymany dimensions at once. The only problem is that
may have a standard length of treatment that theynot all families willingly participate. The systems
adhere to or expect as usual. Generally, this is from 8theoretical base is similar to the Inner Family
to 12 sessions. The work is geared toward reframingapproach in that they will recognize how the family
how you see your problems. It can be quitehas impacted how you have developed as a person.
effective, but for people with deeper issues, it mayEclectic: To be eclectic means to draw on a number
not be the best choice.of resources. Eclectic therapists use skills from any
Cognitive Therapy: "Cognitive" means "thinking".number of methods in which they may have had
These therapists focus on changing how you think.some training. They will use what seems to be
For them it's not WHAT happened to you, but HOWneeded at the moment and not rely completely on
you think about it that matters. There are feelingsform of therapy. The majority of therapists in private
that arise from pure cognitive work, but it is not thepractice use multiple methods in working with clients.
focus of the work. Cognitive therapy has long beenThis approach is not only common; it is what most
recognized as effective and a powerful tool forpeople find comfortable.
change. Cognitive therapists nay not opt to addressOnce you have booked the interview, write down a
deeper or older grief, because they tend to addresslist of questions of things that are important to you.
only how you think about things in the present.Some suggested questions could be (depending on
Psychoanalysis: This is Freud's' method of therapy.what your priorities are):
Purely psychoanalytic therapists sit at the end of aHow frequently should we book sessions?
couch and ask the client to lie down in a positionAre you available for emergency sessions if I am in a
where they cannot see the therapist. The therapistbad place?
says little more than; "Is that so?" or "What else".How do you handle between session phone calls?
Many therapists use the theories of psychoanalysisHow long have you been practicing?
without doing pure psychoanalysis. A stronglyHow comfortable are you with expressions of
psychoanalytic therapist will say very little in session.intense emotion? (This one is hard because you will
Psychoanalysis generally takes years to complete andonly really know the answer once you have let
can be powerfully effective. Some people areyourself have some feelings with this person.)
uncomfortable with a therapist that interacts so littleIf I were to tell you that I was suicidal (clarify for
with them.them if this is true or not), what would you say to
Person-Oriented Psychotherapy: This is Carl Rogers'me?
method. Carl Rogers himself was a gentle, kind manAre you religious? (You may want to have them
who listened very intently. He developed the skill ofclarify how that will impact therapy, if at all.)
"Mirroring", and defined "Empathetic Listening".The answers to these questions, along with any
Person-Oriented therapists are very gentle, kind andothers that you come up with on your own, will
empathetic listeners. People often find themselvesimpact each of us differently. Some of these may
quite comfortable with this type of therapist. Butnot matter to you; just ask the ones that do. But
again, therapy can take a very long time.the most important thing to determine in the session
Body-Centered Psychotherapy: Bodywork is ais: Do you feel comfortable disclosing information
method of psychotherapy that focus's on the body.about your most personal issues with this person?
By focusing on your body, bodywork therapistsDoes this person feel safe? If you feel uneasy with
assist in opening the flow of emotions. Depending onthis person you may need to keep looking.
your needs and capabilities, the work can move intoWhile the task of finding a therapist may feel
simple physical exercises designed to connect youoverwhelming, it's well worth the effort. Recent
more deeply with yourself. Some minor touch maystudies suggest that psychotherapy is more
be used. You will need to discuss your comfort leveleffective than medication alone for depression and
and boundaries with the therapist. This can be aeven anxiety.