| Like many beneficial habits worth acquiring, | | | | the following questions: "in what specific way have I |
| developing self-acceptance is not always an easy | | | | failed?" "In what specific way have I acted foolishly?" |
| task. It's necessary to practice and work persistently | | | | We will see that this line of thinking produces a focus |
| in order to develop successful self-acceptance skills. | | | | on individual acts of the person. They specifically |
| A psychological treatment technique known as | | | | counter a global way of perceiving yourself. You will |
| cognitive behavioral therapy has been shown to help | | | | then be able to tell yourself, "well, I didn't do this |
| people who suffer from low self-esteem. It actually | | | | particular task to the best of my ability and it didn't |
| changes the way people think about themselves and | | | | turn out the way I wanted it to - but that one task |
| it makes your "self-talk" much more positive. What is | | | | doesn't make me a failure". At the end of the day |
| self-talk? As you go about your daily tasks and | | | | you might want to write down in a journal positive |
| activities don't you spend time with thoughts running | | | | things that happened to you during the day and |
| through your mind and frequently these are | | | | activities that you performed to bring about the |
| evaluative thoughts? For example "I did this really | | | | positive outcomes. You will then be able to have a |
| well" or "I'm a complete failure because ...". That is | | | | balanced picture of yourself - neither failure nor all |
| what psychologists refer to as self talk. A major goal | | | | knowing and superior - rather you will see a series of |
| of cognitive behavioral therapy is to change self-talk. | | | | positives and negatives which characterized the way |
| Persons with low self-esteem frequently have very | | | | you performed during the day. And this agrees with |
| negative self-talk and some persons have been | | | | what most therapists know; that is, that everyone |
| assessed with having 90% of their daily thinking | | | | has strengths and weaknesses. This technique helps |
| categorized as negatively judgmental toward | | | | a person with low self-esteem began to see |
| themselves. | | | | themselves realistically as a balance of positive and |
| How does cognitive behavioral therapy (CBT) do | | | | negative. |
| this? Although each therapist may have a slightly | | | | Be aware of what you are thinking in addition to |
| different approach to applying this technique, | | | | what you are saying. If you don't think you are a |
| changing the way we think about ourselves is one of | | | | failure then stop having those thoughts! What we |
| the major goals. | | | | think about frequently leads to feelings and then |
| One of the first interventions that a CBT therapist | | | | actions. If you change your thought patterns, your |
| will do is to begin looking for all encompassing or | | | | feelings will change and your actions will change also. |
| "global" labels. When people evaluate themselves | | | | And most importantly, your perception of yourself |
| negatively and perceive themselves as stupid, or | | | | will change. Studies have shown that people can |
| failures, these are the very thoughts that will be | | | | actually control the thoughts that they are having. It's |
| addressed in therapy. A major goal will be to change | | | | not easy, but with practice it can be done. Apply this |
| self-assessment. Before you put yourself down and | | | | new technique, perfect the skill of positive self-talk, |
| classify yourself as a failure it is important to answer | | | | and watch your self-esteem improve on a daily basis. |