| It was a rainy Saturday morning when I finished | | | | Five years ago when I moved from Los Angeles to |
| unpacking from a recent business trip. After jiggling | | | | Kaua'i, Hawaii, I brought all my shoes, knowing full well |
| open the sliding door to my closet, I desperately | | | | that many didn't fit anymore (my feet seem to get |
| tried to find space for a new pair of shoes I had | | | | wider with age). At the time, I didn't know why I |
| purchased. | | | | was taking them, but sitting on the edge of my bed, |
| No such luck. Every time I moved one dusty old box, | | | | holding my black satin heels, I knew: I didn't want to |
| another fell down. | | | | let go of the memories of parties, weddings, |
| "This is it!" I huffed out loud. "This is the day I give | | | | vacations, anniversaries. |
| away all of my old shoes." | | | | I'd worn these shoes during some of the best years |
| The shoes I'm talking about were not just | | | | of my life. They were with me when, against the |
| tattered--many of them no longer fit. Why was I | | | | odds, I went back to school, got a Ph.D., wrote |
| saving them? I got my step stool and up into the | | | | books, and built a private practice as a marriage, |
| nether regions of closet land I went. | | | | family and child counselor. It wasn't just the |
| The first box contained a pair of black satin high | | | | accomplishments that were important. It was all the |
| heels. They were my favorites eight years ago when | | | | wonderful people who enriched each experience. By |
| they were new. I remember wearing them the night | | | | holding on to the shoes, I'd been trying to hold on to |
| I attended a grand performance of Swan Lake by | | | | the memories. Even though moving to Kaua'i was a |
| the Joffrey Ballet. My friends and I were able to go | | | | goal my husband and I worked hard to achieve, it |
| backstage and meet the dancers. | | | | seemed I was still spiritually linked to my 27 years in |
| The next box held the silver-mesh heels with beaded | | | | Los Angeles. |
| flowers delicately draped across the front that I first | | | | I took time to carefully dust off each pair of shoes |
| wore to our youngest son's bar mitzvah 12 years | | | | and put them in a white plastic giveaway bag beside |
| ago. As I closed my eyes, I could still hear his | | | | me. After placing the last pair inside, I twisted a wire |
| 13-year-old changing voice chanting. | | | | tie around the top and reflected upon the importance |
| Less glamorous were my workout shoes, all tattered | | | | of creating space in my life. |
| and torn, but reminding me of exuberant aerobics | | | | I realized that letting go of what no longer fits allows |
| classes at the gym. Each pair of shoes was like an | | | | for experiences -- and shoes -- that fit the person |
| old photo album carrying vivid pictures of treasured | | | | I've become. Now my closet has room for new |
| moments. | | | | shoes to travel with me on the path ahead. |